Tag Archives: Women

Dating Mistakes Women Make

Posted by on January 4, 2011 No comments

Melinda Maximova, VIP matchmaker with Perfect Search, discusses dating mistakes on ChristinaMarie.tv and how she found love.

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THE 40 WAYS WOMEN FAIL IN BED

Posted by on July 19, 2010 1 comment

1. MILKING IT: When stroking a guy’s dick don’t grab it like a bus rail and start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don’t use the penis as if it’s a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms. The male organ is a thing of wonder and beauty,and should be worshiped and held tenderly at all times.The sensitive part is at the top (where your face should be), not two-thirds of the way down.

2. LETHAL WEAPONS: A guy’s scrotum is a wondrous aesthetic achievement of nature to be treated gently. Don’t squeeze the balls like you are squeezing water from a sponge. If you have long nails pull them off with pliers before even looking at a guy’s ball bag.

3. ROBOTS: When sucking a guy’s dick don’t just get on the end of the thing and jam your head back and forward. It’s a beautiful instrument; it should be caressed, inspected, kissed and licked from every angle.

4. SILENT FRIGHT: If you’ve come and cannot be coerced to scream to show your appreciation, at least make some sort of sign to inform the guy that he’s done his duty and can blow his biscuits whenever he wants.

5. PHONE TURN-Off: Don’t put your mobile phone next to the bed and say: “I’m just waiting for a call from my hairdresser to confirm an appointment but we can carry on in the meantime.” Ringing bells might have turned Quasimodo on but not your average stud with 10 pints of lager inside him.

6. NO LAUGHING MATTER: Don’t laugh if your creative male lover gets carried away and says things like “Ride my hard cock you filthy cock-sucking slut” or “I want to rinse your mouth with my fresh, white love juice Laughter at any aspect of the male performance will not enhance it. Just be grateful you’ve got a guy who can speak whole sentences.

7. CLOSING UP: If a man is willing to take the trouble to come on your face, don’t close your eyes. He wants you to share this ecstatic moment of joyful union with him. Semen is not likely to cause permanent blindness in most cases – but this is a risk you should be prepared to take for his happiness.

8. POOR PRESENTATION: Presentation is all important.Don’t wait to be asked to get it doggy-style. Roll over and present. You know you love it.

9. HANGING AROUND: When he is done, you should not kiss and cuddle, he does not want to touch you. You should leave the bed and leave him in peace. If you are a one-night stand you should leave the premises with out Thieving anything or asking for a phone number.

10. BEING SHY: Always offer the Hershey Highway. You know you love It. If you don’t like it that much, still offer it as you can quite easily play with yourself as he rams away.

11. BEING A DRIP: You always have tissues in your bag, use them to clean his sheets and any ball bag drippage if you have misbehaved and not swallowed everything.

12. LACK OF MAINTENANCE: Never ask a man if he likes your body as you will force him to lie. Men don’t like fat chicks. Get in the gym and lose some weight and tighten those buns and thighs. There is no such thing as the perfect body. 99.6 per cent of men say that even Christy, Elle, Naomi etc all could still lose a few pounds – so what chance have you got?

13. CLOCK-WATCHING: Never, ever, ever, ever even think of saying: “Are you going to come soon.” If you’re doing a blowie, you’d have to take your mouth off to utter the question. If you’re giving a hand-job, you should have gone to the gym to work your biceps. Of he’s shagging you and takes more than 10 minutes you should be grateful. This is not a time trial but a blissful act of union between two sexually aware and gifted human beings.

14. FISHING FOR COMPLIMENTS: Don’t ask him if you’re the best lover he’s ever had. Most men have had so many sexual partners that it is unlikely that you are. Please don’t ask a man to lie about such an important thing.

15. PLAYING DEAD: Don’t just lie there, do something. Good sex is not a spectator sport and it helps if both parties move around a bit. I know you expect the men to do all the hard and skillful work. We don’t mind that and we’re blessed with the equipment and know-how to do it but at least put some effort into the act to show your appreciation.

16. BEING POSSESSIVE: If you are lucky to have an imaginative lover who can satisfy two women at a time don’t sneer at or reject his exciting suggestion that one of your friends joins you to make up a threesome. If he’s a real man he’s probably shagging her anyway. Plus you might learn something from her to keep your man really happy.

17. NOT KEEPING YOUR HAIR ON: Don’t shave all your pubic hair off. It makes your pussy look like a piece of poultry past its sell-by date. At best, it looks like the snatch of a ten-year-old. If you want to trim, go for a nice sexy racing stripe in the manner favours by the Playboy models that your man would rather be shagging.

18. SPITTING IT OUT: When a man has gone to so much trouble to ejaculate and get his aim right into your mouth, it is rude to spit it out without savouring the taste and gluey texture. You should play with semen like a block of Hubba Bubba, blowing bubbles, chewing and throwing from side to side. A line like “I love it when you come in my mouth” makes for a happy finale to fun and games.

19. INGRATITUDE: Never forget to thank a man for all the effort and energy he has expended on making love to you – especially if a) sex has lasted more than five minutes and/or b) you managed to achieve an orgasm. A man’ s role in sex is far more demanding than a woman’s so it is always nice when one’s prowess is appreciated.

20. SEEKING FAVOURS: Never contemplate taking advantage of your man’s warm after-sex glow to seek favours or make requests. As he drops off into well-deserved slumber, resist the urge to ask :”Do you think I should buy that dress/skirt/sofa/Mercedes/country cottage?” there is a name for the practice of mixing sex with material gain – prostitution.

21. BED-RIDDEN: Too many women fail in bed because they insist on being IN BED. Very few countries have statutes limiting horseplay to a designated room. Let yourself go with some sex in the study, bonking in the bathroom and kinkiness in the kitchen. If you’re lucky, your man might imagine he’s bonking someone sexy and adventurous and he might manage a larger, harder erection.

22. SHARING NOT CARING: Whilst it is understandable that you would be excited after receiving a mouthful of cum, do not be thoughtless in expressing your gratitude by kissing your man on the lips. YOU like semen, HE doesn’t. Be considerate, please.

23. BEING NAKED: Very few female bodies are good to look it so please make an effort to cover up as much as possible with exotic lingerie. Match the outfit to suit your bod. If you’ve got a half-decent ass but no tits for example, wear stockings and suspenders and cover your meagre mammalia with something silky.

24. TOO BRIGHT: If the man switches the light off, it is for a reason, so please don’t insist on seeing what’s going on. If he’s got a bit of a beer belly or a lovebite from a bonk earlier that day, it is his right to keep such matters to himself. If he wants it dark so he can imagine he’s shafting Natalie Imbruglia, please understand this fascinating aspect of the male psyche.

25. PLAYING THE NAME GAME (1) Never embarrass a gentleman by challenging him to remember your name after he’s shagged you. If he thought it was important to remember your name, he would have.

26. PLAYING THE NAME GAME (2): Don’t be angry if you’re lover shouts out another woman’s name during the sexual act. Men have much more complicated lives than women and deal with many more people at work, football club, gym, pub, etc. It’s probably just a close associate and totally innocent. Of course, he might be shagging someone else in his spare time and it is understandable that he should make such an obvious mistake.

27. KEEPING HIM WAITING: Don’t get him all turned on and the let his proud stiffy whither while you go to the bathroom and tone and moisturise every square centimetre of your body. The male erection can be sensitive to 45-minute delays while you go off to make yourself look presentable. If you must follow a strict beauty regime, do it after he’s shot his load and has started to snore.

28. TOOTH ACHE: When we ask you to eat our cock, this should not be taken literally. I know it’s hard to resist but keep the tooth action to a little nibble now and again.

29. YOU CAN’T HURRY, LOVE: If a woman is serious about good oral sex as part of foreplay, 20 minutes is the bare minimum required to give the subtle and complex penis a reasonable working over. Better allow for 45 minutes at least.

30. TWO DIMENSIONAL: It’s not enough to be a specialist – even in the important skill of fellatio. To be regarded as a successful woman in bed you must have a full portfolio of tricks. These should include a penchant for facial glazing and a familiarity with idiosyncrasies of your man’s anal region.

31. CAMERA SHY: If he wants to capture the beauty that is you during those special moments (so he can remember the bits he missed because he was drunk), help him by posing in a gorgeous, pouting way for the camera or video camera.

32. UNSWEET SMELL OF EXCESS: While men are more than happy to lick the pink clam, please give it a bit of a wash once or twice a week. You can have too much of a good thing.
33. OBSESSIVE: The female orgasm is over-rated so don’t spoil everybody’s fun by insisting on having one every time you have sex. Of course, if you do have lots, you should feel free to announce them.

34. PERIOD PAIN (1) : It’s natural for a woman to beg for a good seeing to but please do not a) pretend your period has finished or b) that it hasn’t even started. Just go without and let your man catch up with his fantasies about your friends, his young and pretty work colleagues and the girls he shagged before he met you.

35. PERIOD PAIN (2): Having said that (above), just because you’re on the blob, it doesn’t mean his natural and healthy urges have gone away. Don’t put sex off limits for the duration of your period. Use this special time together to work on your oral and massage techniques.

36. THE BIG SWITCH (OFF): Nothing is worse than giving a man some encouragement and then not finishing the job. Such encouragement might be the slightest brush against any part of his body. So if he’s got a stiffy, you’ve got to deal with it and take things through to their natural conclusion.

37. WAKE-UP CALLER: Men have busy and demanding schedules so please understand if he should occasionally (say three times a week) fall asleep while on the job. You should take it as a compliment that he feels so relaxed.
38. COVER UP: If you have lured a man to bed under the guise of being a sultry temptress with long eyelashes and painted lips, please keep the illusion going until he has discharged his porridge gun or fallen asleep. If you care about him, you will make sure he never discovers the terrible secret hidden beneath your caked-on make-up.

39. PUTTING A DAMPENER ON THE EVENING: Don’t make a fuss about sleeping on the damp patch. If God wanted men to sleep on the messy remains of coitus he would have given us a snatch.

40. TV SINNER: The only TV programs suitable for accompanying good sex are hardcore porn (especially involving yourself) or a football match. No gardening or knitting programs to be watched.

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The sex stuff women keep secret

Posted by on June 8, 2008 No comments

My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday women's sexual fantasiesThe most important thing you can do is to understand the opposite sex. If you are a man you want to learn and know more about how women think and vice versa. One of the best way to do so is to investigate sexual fantasies or past sexual behavior. This is not something everybody can stomach, however, you can get the a very good idea of things by reading other people’s confessions. One source of such explicit confessions by women is the excellent book by Nancy Friday – My Secret Garden.

Anyway here’s some more food for thought…
“I used to sleep around.”

Jenni, 27, arts marketer, married for one year

  • Loves middle-of-the-night sex with her husband
  • Prefers to be on top
  • Never travels without her Pocket Rocket vibrator
  • Sleeps in Superman underwear“I used to worry that I wasn’t sexy or desirable enough, and as a result, I constantly sought attention and approval from men. I cheated on every one of my boyfriends. Fortunately, I grew up and learned to love myself, and that made it possible for me to fall in love with my husband, Doug – the first guy who saw through my sexpot act. He encourages me to be myself, in and out of bed, and seems to take so much pleasure from my pleasure that I now have real sexual confidence.”

    • “I fell for my best friend when I was 17.”Kiki, 29, life coach, single and dating

  • Always makes the first move with women she likes
  • Uses text messaging as foreplay in public places
  • Has never had a drunken hookup – she’s a teetotaller
  • Has had sex in a taxi and on a Ferris wheel “The first time I had sex with a guy, I was completely unimpressed. I thought, “?Is this what everyone is hyping up?’ But since that is true about a lot of women’s first experiences, I wasn’t convinced I might be gay. That didn’t happen until I fell for my best friend when I was 17. I love that I’m able to challenge people’s assumptions about what being a lesbian is. Because if I’m gay, then their co-worker or the person next to them at the gym or their friend could be gay, too.”

    • “At first, my boyfriend was embarrassed to hear my stories.”

    Chiara, 28, writer, in a one-year relationship

  • Has been known to put on her old cheerleader outfit to spice things up in the bedroom
  • Is obsessive about maintaining her Brazilian wax
  • Reads steamy stories to her boyfriend
  • Is attracted to type A personalities “Growing up I was taught that men only want to marry good girls, so I was quick to say “?Eew!’ to anything sex related. Then I signed up for a class on writing erotica, which really opened my mind. At first, my boyfriend was embarrassed to hear my stories. But he came around! Couples that last are the ones who can explore things within their relationship, so there’s no need to go looking for them elsewhere.”

    • “My boyfriend and I have an open relationship.”Carrie, 27, designer, in a six-year relationship

  • Broke the futon the first time she slept with her boyfriend
  • Fantasies about Matthew McConaughey
  • Doesn’t believe in monogamy
  • Once kicked a guy out of bed for not having a condom“When I first brought up the possibility of an open relationship with my boyfriend, he was against the idea. But eventually he decided that as long as we were discreet, honest and respectful, there was no reason not to give it a try. Five years on, it’s still working out great. I tend to have longer side relationships; he meets people through friends or out at bars and has more short-term flings. Being allowed these exploits actually makes us more dedicated to each other.”

    • “Now I love my body and I’ve learned not to worry about it in bed.”

    Lori, 33, manager, in a 10-month relationship

  • Used to overcompensate for her body insecurities by being aggressive in bed
  • Now thinks “plain, simple” sex is the best sex
  • Bans her cat from the bedroom when she’s fooling around
  • Has a thing for outdoor quickies on hiking trails“A few years ago, I was stuck in a relationship where the sexual chemistry was practically non-existent. The lack of spark made me feel unattractive, inadequate and so insecure about my body that we eventually stopped having sex altogether. Naturally, we broke up soon after that. A few months after we called it quits, a friend phoned me and suggested that I join her for a getaway to a retreat in America. Turned out clothing was optional! Eventually, I went naked myself. I realised that focusing on my imagined flaws – like my too-big butt – was a waste of time. Now I love my body and learned not to worry about it in bed!”
  • “Believe me, I’ve tried to orgasm – on my own and with partners.”Emily, 21, student and tutor, single and dating
  • Has never had an orgasm
  • Loves trashy romance novels
  • Says random things during sex, like “I want ice cream!”
  • Spent two years of high school secretly dating a guy 10 years older than her“Believe me, I’ve tried to orgasm – on my own and with partners. I’ve read books, I’ve looked up info online, but there’s no manual designed just for me. Now I’m dating someone who’s willing to work with me, so I’m hopeful. He’ll ask, “?What do you like?’ I’ve always been preoccupied with making the guy feel good, and my automatic response used to be “?What do you like?’ But I’m learning how to honestly answer that question.”
  • Confess up Haven’t had your fill of sex secrets just yet? Okay, then! Check out these stats from our survey of 3 000 women.
  • Have you ever had a threesome?
    16% Yes
    84% No

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    The masculine problem of single women and how to fix it

    Posted by on January 11, 2008 2 comments

    This week I was interviewed by for an article in Soul magazine about why there is more single women than ever before. And it was so weird because I had been thinking about the masculine and the feminine in new ways over the last two weeks and had this discussion with a few women.

    Steven Ross Conscious Media NetworkMy basic inspiration for this world view comes from watching an interview with Steven Ross on the Conscious Media Network about Beauty. At some point early in the interview he begins to explain how it is the devine feminine in the world has created beauty, love and harmony not the masculine. “The great poets, musicians, philosophers that have brought beauty in the world, whether they are men or women. It came from the feminine side of the being, not the the male, masculine side. And so when we look at intuition, healing, perception, that comes from the feminine side of the nature. And for women to abandon and not to understand who they are is bringing the (human) race down in the opposite direction it could be going. Because the male does not produce beauty, the male does not produce art. And we’re talking about the masculine energy. Of course males do but it’s that feminine side. And it does not mean somebody is effeminate or gay. It just means that this is the creative beautiful side.”

    Read more »

    Why you should avoid dating divorced women

    Posted by on January 1, 2008 35 comments

    Recently I bumped into a woman whom I met about 5 years ago at nightclub. At first glance she still looked hot after all these years. A slim body and sexy clothes, flat tummy and nice boobs. However, she was likely more bitchy than when we first met. This time however, I had also become more assertive. And I kept joking around with her and her friends.

    At some point I was speaking to her friend and she explained they were both ?divorced with no kids.? No you may or may not know my stance on dating women with kids but that is a non-negotiable for me these days. The way this woman added ?no kids? really got me thinking about it. So obviously they were what’s called ?back on the market? and the woman I met 5 years ago made a very bad decision in her marriage. Whatever the specific reasons for it not working out is irrelevant because my frame of mind says that woman choose the men, no matter how the men misbehave, they, the woman actually made this bad choice. And what gets to them eventually is knowing this. In the same light my mother chose my dad, whom she divorced after a few short years. In general women, the media and society tend to blame the men for bad behaviour, cheating, drinking, slacking, etc.

    Anyway another way of thinking about women stems from the concepts of premiums and discounts I discovered listening to FJ Shark’s Keys to the Kingdom of Women audio programme. The basic idea here is that premiums are high maintenance, expect more than they give, and in general should be avoided when you first notice them. They may be very attractive, which is what helps them get away with their bitchy behaviour. And men must become more assertive, identify the two basic types of women, and cut losses quickly or move forward quickly. It’s also the trait of a good salesman, that is qualifying your clients quickly so you do not waste to much time on dead leads.

    Here’s some reasons why you don’t want to date divorced women:

    • they made a bad decision (no matter what the guy did, they chose him)
    • they likely to give you the run around about sex and intimacy
    • they very likely to have commitment issues and other psychological baggage
    • you are not there to play Freud
    • you are not looking to make new friends because you have friends already
    • there are many women, never married from 18 to 38

    As I keep saying more and more these days: If you are going through all the effort reading and studying seduction and dating, to improve your success with women, it becomes a real test of character to get them coming back for more. Anyone can have one night stands, and we’ve all been there, done that. But when you are working so hard on improving your life, it is good when you are able to draw on the self-esteem interest you’ve been building over the years. Don’t give up. Keep on, keeping on.

    What’s your experience been in dating divorced men or women??

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    Be aware of before moving in together

    Posted by on December 17, 2007 No comments

    Here is some comments from an email interview with Ramon Thomas that was published in Move! magazine.

    1. Discuss Money Matters

    Single and living together

    One of the most common mistakes people make in merging their lives is not to discuss money. And one of the biggest causes of break-ups and divorces in general is disagreements about money. Part of this discussion should include what each will do. So for example if one is doing the cooking, the other could do the dishes and vice-verse. Write out a clear agreement on how money will be spent and how you will split your responsibilities around the house.

    2. Have a Backup Plan

    Nothing last forever. So be prepared for the reality of things not working out. Think ahead and plan ahead. Make sure you do not cut ties with friends and family now that you are moving in together because they will be part of your backup plan when you need them. You do not want to alienate them. Have some savings put away or have a contingency plan so you can act quickly.

    The biggest thing to remember is to be pragmatic about moving in together. Love can be blind but don’t let yourself get the short end of the stick.

    Also checkout It may be a mistake to live together before getting married.

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    Investing in yourself so you can overflow and give to women

    Posted by on July 17, 2007 1 comment

    Life, relationships and all human interactions relate best to the basic principles of economics which is supply and demand. When you have an oversupply of goods e.g. desperate guys trying to get the attention of an attractive woman their value drops very fast in her eyes because they are all doing the same thing to try and impress her. Now imagine a guy who ignores her and talks to other women creating curiosity and interest from her; his value rises because he is in demand and the more other women he speaks to this attractive women will start to become interesting in getting his attention. So you want to avoid group behaviour. Another way to look at this is to keep investing in yourself. And the more you invest in yourself the more attractive you become. And the more you give to yourself, you begin to overflow so that you have more to share with those around you.

    Although I’m not a fan of John Gray, this concept is from a quote he makes in the hit movie The Secret. Remember you can contact your friendly neighbourhood Dating Coach here.

    The 5 biggest mistakes professionals make when it comes to meeting women

    Posted by on July 16, 2007 No comments

    This is part of a Q&A series from my CNBC Africa interview. So here is my list of the biggest mistakes professionals make. You know just last week I was walking toward Village Walk in Sandton and I spotted a group of guys who likely work at Rand Merchant Bank or Investec. They were all wearing black suits and probably going for lunch. Now the first thing I noticed here is that these guys all looked the same. There was nothing that set any of them apart from the other. In fact they all looked like could be working in a morgue. So when it comes to how you’re dressing for work it will make a huge difference is you can just wear one item like a tie or a shirt that can get the attention of women. There is a theory in the seduction world worth exploring here called peacocking.

    Anyway here’s my top 5 mistakes. Post additional ones as comments on this post.

    1. Not approaching the women they really want to approach
    2. Instead of trying different approaches, they keep trying harder doing the same thing
    3. Nervousness and anxiety prevents them from acting normal
    4. Not knowing how to escalate physically
    5. Focussing to much on one woman and not improving their overall success with women

    How to get a women’s phone number in 2 minutes

    Posted by on May 17, 2007 7 comments

    Ramon's new phone Sony Ericsson w880iOn Tuesday I went to the traffic department to pick-up my new drivers license. As fellow South Africans will know – this is a nightmare. The whole system is so messed up because of computer glitches and government bureaucracies and bungling…’nuff said.

    Anyway while waiting in the queue I see this woman reading a Danielle Steel book. So as I walked in I immediately made a loud comment about the two guys on either side of her being losers for not talking to her. In fact I pointed to her and said “How rude! Do you guys realise she’s telling you how boring you are and her book is more interesting then whatever you have to say?”

    She hit back that they had been stuck in traffic department for two days. They were there the previous day and the systems went down so they came back. Now the great Chinese sage, Lao Tzu, once said those who justify do not convince. And here she was – I hardly know her – and she is defending herself. If she did not care she would continue to read. First IOI – indicator of interest – and she asked me a question – next IOI. My name was called and picked up my drivers license card. I returned to her, asked for her cellphone, called myself and asked her name as a I left – remarking that somebody up there likes me.

    So there was some warm-up conversation. Always teasing and never letting on. From the moment I sat down, asked for her phone, called my own number and returned her phone asking for her name > less than 2 mins! This has been one of my favourite ways of getting a woman’s phone number.

    The next article will be reposted from David DeAngelo and his technique on email addresses and phone numbers. I’ve tried it and it causes to much of a delay so go directly for the phone number.